$38 lesson

My son who recently turned 11 years old asked for an Xbox one for his birthday. I told him $400 on a new game console plus games was way too much when his current Xbox still works just fine. My husband and I made him a deal, that if he worked and saved for the new xbox then we would buy him a new game to go along with it. Between chores and birthday money ( I had to stop the grandparents from just giving him the money), he had manged to save $180. The other day he asked me to take him to the store because he wanted to get a new game. When we saw it was $60 and he didn’t have enough cash on hand to buy it, he asked if he could use his savings. I told him it was his money to do with what he wanted but using $60 of it now would make him further in the hole towards his new xbox. He said he understood and bought it anyway. As soon as we got home he ran to his room to play the game and I went to transfer the money from his savings to my checking, and he came out and said “I can’t play it on my xbox! I don’t have enough memory!” I looked at the box and it stated on the box you needed at least 1G to play this game. He had deleted everything he could but still didn’t have enough room. His Dad came home from work and concluded he would need a buy an external hard drive to play it, thus using more of his new xbox money to play it. He didn’t want to that. We couldn’t return it because he had already opened it. So I tried to sell it on a virtual yard sale. First for $50, then for $45, $40, then lowering it to $35. Finally we had an offer for $25, less than half of he paid. I asked him what he wanted to do, and he said to take it. So we did. It was a hard lesson to learn, and as much as I just wanted to “eat” the money myself, I didn’t. He chose to buy the game and didn’t read how much memory he needed. He knows I know nothing about these things and since it was not purchase it wasn’t my responsibility to make sure it was going to work.

After we met the buyer and he was paid his $25, we went straight to the bank and he deposited the money along with his cash in his wallet. When we came home he went through his old games and asked me if he could sell the ones he didn’t play anymore. I posted some pictures and he has already made another $20 by selling 4 more games. When his dad said as soon as the grass dried out it needed to be cut again he jumped at the chance to help. He is back on his way to getting his new xbox!

 

I know I am dating myself when I say this but things just weren’t as expensive when I was a kid. My kids have become so use to getting everything bought for them that they have been desensitized as the value of things. I hate to say it but they don’t appreciate the things they have. If it breaks, ‘oh well, we will get a new one.’ If it is lost, ‘oh, well I will get a new one.’ My daughter has lost pieces to games minutes after opening it and said ,’ oh well, I didn’t like that one anyway.’ Ah,….no! I paid for that,….find it and find it now!!!! Had I bought that game for my son he would have just sat it to the side and said, ‘oh well, I can’t play it’ and that would have been that. But because it was his money it was different. It meant something. He lost $38 of money he had worked for not using better judgment.

 

The good news is, my daughter is now saving her money too. She took her piggy bank to the bank and deposited $49 worth of coins in her account and then came home to go through her stuff to see if she could sell anything. She says right now she isn’t saving for anything big, but she wants to have her own money so when she wants something she can buy it.

I told them I will of course continue to buy them clothes, shoes, and schools things. But if they just want something for no reason, they are going to decide if it is really worth it. Wants vs. Needs is a hard lesson to learn.
33

Proud Mama Moment!

motherof2kids:

With so many of my friends posting baseball pics, I was reminded of this post.

Originally posted on mother of 2 kids:

My son started playing baseball at 4 years old. He loves it! But unfortunately he has never been that good. I know, I am his mother, and I am suppose to think everything he does is wonderful, but I am just being honest. When I signed him up to play in an “Athletic League” last year, I had no idea what I was getting him into. I mean, I grew up in this area, and I know how serious people can be about baseball around here. But these are kids,….7 and 8 year olds,…I didn’t think it got really serious until High school. Boy was I wrong! Last year he was one of the younger boys on the team, but honestly that didn’t matter. The other boys on the team, were getting triple plays, home runs, catching pop flies, and making double plays. I thought any minute the Tides, (our…

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The Perfect Mother

June CleaverThe moment we find out we are pregnant we all start making plans. For some of us starts even before that. We all think of our perfect little baby that is on the way and all the things we plan to do. We start thinking of how we want to be the perfect mother. We think of the things our own mothers did wrong and we never want to be like them. And then we think about how our friends with children are messing up their kids lives and we don’t want to be like them. We are going to breast feed, use cloth diapers, let our baby self sooth, sleep in their own crib, never eat fast food, punish them when they need it and stick with those punishments, never let them talk back or throw a tantrum, they will never be in public in dirty clothes and messy faces, they will never have drool or snot running down their faces, they will be potty trained by 2 years old, they will read by the time they can talk and be the neatest, politest children anyone has ever met in their entire lives. When our children go out in the world people will talk about how wonderful they are and ask us for advice.

Not only that but we can certainly handle having a child and maintaining a house at the same time. The house will be clean, laundry will be done, dinner will be on time and of course we will still make time to go to the gym. We will never be “that Mom” at the grocery store in pajamas, hair in a bun,  and slippers. We will always be put together and take care of ourselves. We won’t be “that Wife” that lets herself go, complains all the time, resents her husband for not helping, and couldn’t care less about sex. We will be the same as we were before kids. We will get look good and keep up with ourselves so our husbands will still find us attractive and be sex queens in bed.

We sit back and rub our bellies thinking how different everything is going to be for us and daydream of our children walking across the stage to get his diploma from Harvard. We will be better than June Clever. June Clever didn’t have Pinterest or the Google to help her. We will have the happiest, smartest and most perfect kids in all the land!

Then you find yourself standing in a kitchen that looks like a bomb went off, with only 30 minutes of sleep, hair in a messy bun, random food stuck to our face, wearing the same sweats we have been wearing for 2 days now, trying to mash fruit or our homemade baby food, as the kid screams his ass off in the background because all this homemade baby food has given him the shits (again) and the cloth diapers are still in the dryer because you haven’t been able to do a load of laundry in days,……just as our husband comes home from work and asks “What’s for dinner?”

After a trip to the hair salon and Target, we realize that we have to do this our way. We can’t be June Clever. We should have never judged those mothers in the Walmart looking like death, with 3 kids, one who smells like poop, one who won’t stop running around and the other is throwing a tantrum on the floor. We can’t be the perfect mother, because the perfect mother isn’t real. We have to stop comparing ourselves to those moms who seem to have it together and just try to do the best we can.

I am not the kind of mother I thought I would be. I didn’t think it would be easy by any means, but I had no idea it would be this hard either. But I am not one of these mothers who thinks my job is the hardest job in the world. I am a Stay at Home Mom of 2 kids, 6 and 10. Both of my kids are in school for 6 hours a day, 5 days a week. Our house is only 1946 sq. feet and I drive a 2012 Nissan Rogue. My kids have played baseball and soccer and my daughter takes dance as well. I am busy, don’t get me wrong, I am busy most days,…but some days I spend the day sitting in front of the TV watching all programs I have DVR’ed that week.

I go to the gym and even go tanning a few times a week. I have a “cleaning schedule” for my house and a “laundry schedule” for our clothes. I also find the time to sit in front of my computer and write books and 2 blogs. I think it would be fair to mention I have OCD. My OCD consists of schedules. I am a lot like a toddler in such a way that I need to have a schedule. I like to make lists. I need to know what I need to do so I can get it done.

Under no circumstance do I think my job is harder than my husbands. True, I don’t get time off. When he comes home from work his work day is over. My work day is never over. I get extremely frustrated sometimes and want to give resignation at least 2 times a week. I help the kids with homework I don’t understand myself, go to parent/teacher conferences and feel like a child in trouble, I schedule doctor’s appointments, maintenance on the cars, chaperone field trips, go to kids birthday parties with my kids, and make sure they have whatever they need for whatever they need it for. But I don’t think my job harder than my husbands or a lot of jobs out there.

But that is me. That is who I am. That is how I feel. I might be more organized than others on some days, and be falling a part and crying like a little girl when others wouldn’t on other days. I use to be “that mom” who would look and judge other moms. But I try very hard not to do that anymore.

Every week while I watch the news I hear about a new “Mommy War”. Moms arguing over breastfeeding/bottle feeding, sleep alone/ co-sleeping, public/home schooling, staying at home/working outside the home, daycare/home care, paying kids for chores/not paying them,….and the list goes on and on. Yes, I have opinions on all of these subjects, strong opinions. But do I think mine is the only one or even the right one? No.

I did what was right for me and my kids and my family. You do what is right for you and your family. Why can’t we just all agree that we are doing what is best what is best our families and that be the end of it. Why do we have to argue about it? Why do we have to make others feel bad for their choices? I am so tired of “Mommy wars”. We should all be supporting each other. Being a mother is hard. We are raising the little human beings that will taking care of us when we have lost of teeth and our memories. Being a mother is hard. All we can do is do the best we can do. So the next time you see a story about a Mommy war, and feel the need to shout at the screen or comment on the story,….make sure it is to support the mom. She might have 5 little ones at home under the age of 5, some in cloth diapers, and needs to make her homemade baby food,…and her husbands dinner.

Conversations with my kids

1Shane: Mom, you’re drinking a mountain dew, are you ok?
Me: It’s diet
Shane: are you ok?
Me: I’ve had a bad day
Shane: Because you were crying?
(I didn’t say anything, but I looked at him)
Shane: I heard you crying last night.
Me: I’ll be alright
Shane: I know you will, because you always are,….but Mom, it’s really ok if you’re not ok. You don’t have to be strong all the time. We understand.
(of course I started crying again, he went to the fridge and got me another diet dew)
Shane: here, you might this too.
then he gave me a hug,…

 

 

2I finally bought myself a desk chair! Hailey just came in and said, “Is your butt comfy?” I said, “yes it is.” She said, “good, because I like being the only pain in your butt.” I swear this child and the things she comes up with!

 

A Conversation with my daughter about boyfriends: (we were writing out her Valentines for her class)
Hailey: Mom, I really like this one boy in my class.
Me: Good, I’m glad.
Hailey: He’s my boyfriend
Me: Oh ok.
Hailey: Do you have a boyfriend?
Me: Ahh, no I have a husband,….your Dad,…remember?
Hailey: Yes, but a husband is not a boyfriend.
Me: Well true. So I guess your Dad is my husband and my boyfriend.
Hailey: Your boyfriend can’t be in your family! Your boyfriend has to be someone not in your family.
Me: We weren’t always family. When we first met we weren’t in the same family.
Hailey: Did you tell him he was your boyfriend?
Me: Yes, I guess I did.
Hailey: and then you married him?
Me: yes,…eventually.
(A few cards later)
Hailey: I like this boy too,…he’s my boyfriend too.
Me: Oh, good lord Hailey,…how many boyfriends do you have?
(she started counting on her fingers,….at 5,…I told her to stop and keep writing the cards.) Lord help me!

~~~~~~~~~~

Me: Ok kids, dinner is going to be ‘every man for himself kinda thing’, so tell me what you want, so I can make it.
Hailey: Um, I think I want some noodles.
(I start the noodles, and then go back to Shane’s room)
Me: Shane, tell me what you want for dinner.
Shane: I don’t know.
Me: Well you need to make a decision before I sit down to eat whatever I make for myself.
(go back finish Hailey’s noodles, wash some dishes, then go back to Shane)
Me: I am making myself a grill cheese sandwich, do you want one?
Shane: no.
Me: What do you want?
Shane: I don’t know.
Me: ok
(I go back and finish the dishes, sweep the floor, make some tea, and then make my sandwich, while I heat a bowl soup too. Sandwich is done, I get all my stuff to the table, then take out of the trash, and wipe down the counters. All while hearing nothing from Shane.)
The second my butt hits the chair, so I can eat my dinner,….
Shane: I think I do want a grill cheese sandwich.
( I roll my eyes, hand him my sandwich, and watch my soup get cold, while I get out the frying pan I just finished washing to make me another sandwich.)
Now I am just sitting down to eat my dinner again, and Hailey is ready for desert.
The kids need to go back to school before someone gets hurt.

5

Weight Loss Tracking

My husband’s return date keeps getting moved around and I feel like I am on a roller coaster. I was hoping to lose 25 lbs by the time he gets home, but it looks like I am going to have to be happy 12 lbs.

I am happy that I weight less now than I did before I had my children. I am happy that feel better, have more energy and look better in my clothes. I feel better in my skin. I am happier and more confident.

I went back to my “roots” so to speak, when it comes working out and eating. Everything in Moderation is my theory and has been my theory from the beginning. I have been going to a few yoga, core, and strength training classes, running on the elliptical 45 minutes 5 days a week and practicing portion control. I cut back a little more on the sweets, fast food and overall snacking to cut a few more pounds, and that is when the pounds starting coming off.

I am going to continue working out at this level and hope to lose the last 13 lbs soon. (18) 164

30 Day Workout Update

I finished my second 30 day workout which was buns, guns, and abs. It took me longer than 30 days to complete because mid way I really started to hurt. My great friend, Heather, who was doing the workout with me had a great idea. We started doing the days for 2 and 3 days at a time, instead of just one day. That way we weren’t pushing ourselves to hard and we were able to work on our strength and endurance at the same time.

buns guns

 

 

This is the workout I was doing for the last month a half. It was hard, but I am did it,…finally. I feel stronger, but again I didn’t lose much weight. I lost the 4 lbs I had a gained with the 30 day shred workout, and I can now comfortably fit into my size 12 jeans. They were tight, too tight before and now they fit perfectly. I was a size 12 before I had kids, so I guess in a small way I have met one of my goals. I would just like to see more lbs come off.

 

 

 

 

25 YMCA 10 milesI joined the YMCA today! And to celebrate I ran 10 miles! Here I am in the YMCA locker room after my run, rocking my “Katniss braid”. I thought since I managed to lose 40 lbs with nothing but portion control and walking, I would try that again. I am still going to start another 30 Day workout, but I am also going to add cardio.

My husband will be home in a few months, and I know he has lost a lot of weight,…and I can’t let him win.

Next Workout “Get your Body Back” 10 minute workout. It’s eight different moves, and you do 3 sets of 12. I am going to try to find a picture or list of the workout so I can post it.

Sorry I have been so bad posting results and updates. Thanks for reading.

 

 

The Kids have been out of school for way too long,……..

017Me: Ok kids, dinner is going to be ‘every man for himself kinda thing’, so tell me what you want, so I can make it.
Hailey: Um, I think I want some noodles.
(I start the noodles, and then go back to Shane’s room)
Me: Shane, tell me what you want for dinner.
Shane: I don’t know.
Me: Well you need to make a decision before I sit down to eat whatever I make for myself.
(go back finish Hailey’s noodles, wash some dishes, then go back to Shane)
Me: I am making myself a grill cheese sandwich, do you want one?
Shane: no.
Me: What do you want?
Shane: I don’t know.
Me: ok
(I go back and finish the dishes, sweep the floor, make some tea, and then make my sandwich, while I heat a bowl soup too. Sandwich is done, I get all my stuff to the table, then take out of the trash, and wipe down the counters. All while hearing nothing from Shane.)
The second my butt hits the chair, so I can eat my dinner,….
Shane: I think I do want a grill cheese sandwich.
( I roll my eyes, hand him my sandwich, and watch my soup get cold, while I get out the frying pan I just finished washing to make me another sandwich.)
Now I am just sitting down to eat my dinner again, and Hailey is ready for desert.
The kids need to go back to school before someone gets hurt.

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